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By Jane Disdain in bitch no

Ok.  So.  I work at Ollie’s Bargain Outlet down the road.  Well.  A week or so ago, Jim (the store manager) came and talked to me while I was by myself on a slow day.  He started talking to me about the book department.  (I think he was fishing for something now that i think about it.)  I told him that if he wanted to make Shenelle a department head to go ahead and do it because she was much faster than I am.  (I don’t have 3 giant boys to keep up with.)

So now she’s dept head.  She has let the power go to her damn head.  Not only do I have to look after the book department and the stationary department (both which need constant upkeep), I am also looking after DVD’s and the two giant Paula Dean and Rachael Ray displays we have in the center of the giant main aisle.  Also!!  We have a onesie’s shelf (basically a shelf or two of books that go straight across for the books we have only 1 – 4 of) full of “whatever for dummies”.  I have to alphabetize 4 shelves of them.  ALSO!  I have to ticket a couple pallets (at least) a day.  I did not know this so I had done other stuff already.

By the end of my shift, I WAS SWAMPED!  I had other people who were finished with their departments come in and help me.  They could tell I was pissed off too.  She waited until 3 hours before closing to tell me this.  We close at 9.  We have 2 hours to recover the store.  Sadly, it takes about that long to get through the books and then to start on stationary.  Everything has to be done precisely.  I was running around and holding my pants the entire time so they wouldn’t fall.  Everything got done because I politely gave orders and said thank you repeatedly to these people so we could leave.  We almost got out at midnight.  Its not the first time we’ve stayed almost that long.  It doesn’t help they’re cutting our help.  (I think I might be up on the chopping block for this shit.)

Shenelle came in on her day off to give me orders.  It could have taken 5 minutes to tell me to do a couple pallets at least a day.  But no.  We have World War Books going on and I am stuck in the fucking middle.  I have had to clean up after her mess on 3rd shift and I have had to clean up after 1st shifts shit.  First shift and dept head seem to not be seeing eye to eye on things.  On my two days off this past week, Cassie (1st shift) was working my shifts.  Shenelle did not like how she was doing “recovery” (where we straighten everything up and make it look pretty).  So, I got to hear it from more than one damn person.

Cassie complained to me about Shenelle’s behavior and messes that she leaves.  Shenelle has complained to me about Cassie’s whatevers.  PEOPLE THAT DON’T EVEN WORK IN OUR DEPARTMENT have come to me and told me about this shit.  AND Jim has told me about the complaints.  So… WTF?!  Why does being reliable mean you get shit all over!?  I take charge when I have to, but holy fucking shit dude.  I am carrying a lot of other people’s weight and doing my own work and I’m even needing help from people WHO ACTUALLY FUCKING DO THEIR WORK.

The thing that really grinds my gears is that Shenelle told Jim that she was going to train me to do some things.  Like.  Really.  Really fucking really.  SHE’S BEEN IN THE DAMN DEPARTMENT AS LONG AS I FUCKING HAVE.  I HAVE GOTTEN THE HANG OF SHIT AND I KNOW TO PUT THE PAPERBACKS WITH THE PAPERBACKS AND THE HARD BACKS WITH THE HARDBACKS.  BUT TO TRAIN ME!?  TO DO WHAT?!  The store has only been open for about 3 or so weeks.  WHAT THE FUCK DOES SHE KNOW THAT I HAVEN’T BEEN ABLE TO PICK UP!?  Is it her way of doing shit?  WE KIND OF HAVE GUIDELINES TO FOLLOW.  What the corporate heads want, the corporate heads get!  Jesus.

Now my insomnia is from dealing with the anxiety and stress all this shit is putting on my mind and body.  I felt like stabbing someone with my damn box cutter.  Its rather blunt, but I’m sure I could get it to do its job right.  I think I’ll go in, fix up the book department to looking nice and go ticket some fucking boxes. Then come out and clean up the damn areas.

(P.S. She told me that she talked to Jim about making me work Sundays.  WHEN THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSE TO GET A BREAK?  A weekend?  What is that?)

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By Jane Disdain in bitch no

So.  The store has officially opened today.  My manther (an older man who dates younger women), Vince,  has been put on 3rd shift.  I work second, so I see him maybe 20 min.  My (maybe) 20 year old that’s built like a brick house, Kee, works first shift so I see him maybe an hour.  I’m the only one in my area for 2nd shift, well that’s not true.  My fucking helper wanders the god damn store.

I’m the only one in my area, as you read, and I have two managers I am working under.  One tells me to do something, the other comes and expects me to do what I’m just told for them.  Neither of them fucking communicated with the other.  I got told to do something twice, 2 seconds after being told to do it the first time.  I was setting things down and making sure they wouldn’t fall on customers when I was told to do what I was suppose to do again.  I went and did it.  They bought the book.  (Thank god.)  That was the only time I was told to do something twice.  Normally I would have been over there and on it, but my MIA managers weren’t there to realize that I had just been told by one to do something already.  I had also just returned from lunch and before that, I was at a register or bagging up front.  She couldn’t walk 10 feet and get the god damn step ladder and get it herself, I was just barely fucking tall enough.  She didn’t do shit other than walk up and tell me that we didn’t have tickets for a bunch of shit like I was suppose to actually ralph them out of my mouth like a printer.  Half the time she wasn’t even in the fucking area.

The temp manager is Carmen.  I want to kick her smug face in with my shoe.  While I was instructing someone on what to do about checks and credit cards, I noticed the book section was tore up from the floor up.  I hadn’t been over there for an hour and a half.  I’d been at a register or bagging.  Carmen mysteriously appeared and overheard me say between instructions that the books needed to be cleaned up.  She bitchily turned around and acted like I was stupid for not marching over there to clean them up after being under orders.  She fussed at me for being lax and then told me to go clean it up since there were no customers.  Shortly after I start cleaning the mess, the store closes so the registers get swamped.  I ducked behind some shelves and started the cleaning.  The register manager who had put me under orders inquired to where I went.  Fortunately for me, the cashier that I was instructing was polite enough to explain what had happened.  I was not in trouble.

I got there at 3:30 because of really shitty weather.  I was asked to go out on the floor and walk around incase someone needed something.  My shift started at 4, so I did a half hour without pay.  Awesome.  Store openings can suck it.  Jim doesn’t ask much from anyone and this is his first store to be the entire head of.  He had three corporate heads to cater to, a bunch of managers to deal with, and a few other things that seemed to put a strain on him.  So, I did it.  Amazing, huh?  Also illegal.

I worked (officially) from 4-11.  I got ONE 15 minute break at 7:15 to eat.  ONE.  I was on the register.  The register managers let me take a break because they were just astounded I hadn’t had one yet.  I walked up to the lounge, after spending 10 more minutes on the floor because people would stop and ask me for information on certain things.  Another 2 min to make my sandwich (which was provided by Tom, an awesome dude there to help set up store that I will probably never see again after all of this) and I sat down for the first time in about 4 hours.  I had enough time to wolf down half my sandwich and I wound up chugging 2 sodas.  Then I was called to pick up books from the front and just said fuck it and sat back down for the remaining 2 minutes of my break.  I worked the rest of the day without a break.

When my shift at 4 started, I was instructed by the 1st shift person of expectations.  I told her that I made no promises to keep things immaculate as possible during hours, but that everything would be cleaned up by her shift tomorrow.  She took it as me saying “I can’t do this shit.”  Everyone got off work at 11, but we couldn’t leave until everything was straightened up.  I had to have the help.  And so I got the help, provided by one of the much more nicer managers.  It took everyone an hour to get the books sorted, straightened, and looking near perfect.  So they let us leave on time.  I hope she doesn’t bitch at me about it.  Carmen would go back behind me and work on shit that I already did AND DO IT THE EXACT SAME FUCKING WAY.

I didn’t even get to go piss while I was there.  I couldn’t find anyone to relieve me (no pun) of my station so I could go, much less find a manager.  I’m not allowed to call one over the pa system for something like that either.  Hurray.  Bladder infections and kidney infections galore!

I work from 2-11 tomorrow and 3-11 on Saturday.  If Jim doesn’t give me Sunday (and hopefully Monday off) after all of this shit, I’m going to maybe snap and kill someone.  That someone might be Carmen.  I was tempted to throw down my shit they provided and fucking walk out without telling anyone I quit.

“Too many chiefs, not enough braves.”

If they fire me after all this bullshit, I’m going to torch the fucking store.

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Yankee benefits.

August 15, 2010
By Jane Disdain in awesome

I get them. How awesome is that shit.

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Imma stab. A Bitch.

August 11, 2010
By Jane Disdain in bitch no

LAUREN HAS A FUCKING SINUS INFECTION!  THE FUCKING CUNT HAS BEEN HACKING UP HER LUNGS ON THE BOOKS FOR THE PAST WEEK AND GUESS WHERE I HAVE BEEN WORKING!?  ALL THE GOD DAMN PEOPLE WORKING ON THE BOOK SECTION IS GETTING FUCKING SICK!!!! 73 DEGREES SHOULD NOT FUCKING MAKE YOU BREAK OUT IN COLD SWEATS AND MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE RALPHING AND PASSING OUT!

FAKE BREASTED WHORE!

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Been workin’.

August 4, 2010
By Jane Disdain in job hunting

Its been going fine at work.  I found out I work with youngins and crazies and cougars and people who are just lazy.

Lauren is lazy.  Bitch cut herself bad enough to get 3 stitches so she doesn’t have to do much work.  A bunch of us want to beat her suck up ass.

Paul is a GM.  HE LOST A PAPER WITH IMPORTANT INFO ON IT.  If I get bad credit and shit goes missing from places no one else has business being, Imma burn a mother fucker.  Its a toss up for now if he’s gay or not.  Techno was playing over the loudspeaker in the back of the store and he hid behind some boxes and was dancing.  He stopped when he noticed we noticed… And he talks about his mother.

Elizabeth is a GM, but she has some sort of sense of humor.  She doesn’t do shit but relax all day on her damn phone.  Anytime the big boss man walks past, she puts her phone down and picks up a box.

Jim is mild.  Nice to talk to and authoritative.  Its a refreshing mix.  No one gets a free ride with him around.  (Unfortunately he’s dealing with the construction people and the head boss man.)

Traci doesn’t do shit when she gets tired.  She just stands there and talks with a box in her hand.

TG is just as mean as I am.  Odella is fucking hilarious and blunt.  Casie could probably knife fight with a box cutter and win.  I think we’re plotting to get some people fired because we get shit done while they don’t and get a free ride.

Vernice is like the mother bear.  She is patient and doesn’t take shit off nobody.  She refers to her husband as “That Fat Ass”, but they’ve been married over 30 years.  Its a term of endearment.

Anthony is a trip.  He’s random, weird, and there’s no telling what that boy will day next.  He does the heavy lifting and can take a joke.

Vince is a pretty cool middle aged guy.  He manages the pallets for us because he knows what he’s doing.  Unfortunately I found myself flirting with his middle aged ass.  When I shut up for a couple hours, he threatened to smother me.  We should have an interesting working acquaintanceship.

Everyone else I am pretty much getting use to.

They’re going to hire 70 people to establish the store.  They’ll probably drop 40 people and keep 30 of the best.  Its like a God damn reality show.

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A Job.

July 28, 2010
By Jane Disdain in job hunting, news

Yesterday was orientation.  I was nervous about the paper work, but everything else didn’t bother me at all.  I wound up getting paid for sitting on my ass from 11:30 until about 2.  That’s not bad.

Today, was my first official day working.  I started out stocking soaps.  I did a good job.  Then I had to stock lightbulbs. Jesus Christ.  Some dumbfuck cut the tape on both sides of the box without folding it back right.  I wound up dropping a bunch of light bulbs in the floor and breaking 4 packages with 4 bulbs in them.  I didn’t get in trouble.  Then I had to sort pickles and then put them in the right place.

If I don’t get a fucking job at the end of this seasonal shit, Imma be pissed if some dumbass who puts heavy shit on top of light shit on a pallet or doesn’t fucking seal a box correctly gets one, Imma burn the fucker down.

I have all these little cuts and slices in my skin from boxes, a smashed finger, a ripped of nail that I didn’t notice, a wound from a metal sliver going in between my nail and skin, and sore elbow joints.  I managed to smash my finger so bad earlier when I was shifting pickles around.  A manager asked what was up when I was getting a box and when he followed me to inspect, I popped my finger back into place (I guess because it stopped hurting) and his face went pale and he walked off.  LOL

All day I was being watched closely by the higher ups.  It was kind of unnerving.  I did manage to take an abundance of something that needed a lot of space and fit it into a small space.  Hell yeah!  Tetris with boxes!!!  I was also told I am a pro with a box cutter.  I should be after years of using it.

While I was working on my first stocking area, the guy that was doing maintenance on the floors in the break room started talking to me.  He kept smiling and winking and talking to me while I worked.  Then when he was leaving, he honked his horn on his shiny awesome truck and waved.  I was the only female out there that wasn’t white haired.  The older woman just looked at me like “WTF did you do?!”  The guy was hot.  He’s Hispanic, but he has a southern drawl.  He speaks English flawlessly with no accent at all.  Time to visit the stock room…  Which I do believe needs flooring done there too…

Anyways!  The day went by fast.  I started at 8:30 and got off work at 5.  They bought us pizza and gave us drinks.

BTW…  While I’m thinking about it…

I TOLD YOU FUCKERS I WAS LOOKING FOR A JOB!

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Food poisoning.

July 25, 2010
By Jane Disdain in meanness

Is it really so much to ask for someone to get a mild case of food poisoning and not be able to eat for a few days and vomit profusely and have problems with dehydration?  I mean really.  Most people pray for miracles.  All I ask is for a speedy Karmatic take down!

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Jane has a job.

July 24, 2010
By Jane Disdain in news

Its at a place called Ollie’s.  Its a new store to the area and I go in for orientation on Tuesday.  The store actually opens August 19th.

Its not a bad thing I guess.  Its just that unfortunately, as my first job, I get to find out what its like to cancel plans for the first time on my birthday because chances are I will have to work.  Hurray.  Ugh.

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By Jane Disdain in nerdiness

I’ve felt ridiculously awful with a fever the past week.  So since I didn’t feel like looking at a screen and I also couldn’t sleep from body aches and a headache, I started to accumulate some silk foliage in a basket and I stared at my glue gun with cruel intent.

These are what I’ve made (these are kinda shit pics):

hairclips1

hairclips3

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Strange dreams.

July 10, 2010
By Jane Disdain in dreams

Ok.  The past before this one explains the strange dream I had just before waking up.  This one is for the past 3 nights…

Wednesday Night:

In this dream, I was a man again. I was putting on war paint, not exactly like the Indians, but he had it smeared on his cheeks.  I could feel the bushy beard on my chin.  I could smell the wood fire and the sod house.  I could feel the warmth of the furs I wore as I grabbed for my sword.  It was long and heavy and old.  The hilt was wrapped with worn leather and was rather plain.  It fit perfectly in my hand like my hand was made for wielding it.  I grabbed it and walked outside through a wooden door.  I took in a deep breath of the cold from the fresh snow and felt it burn my lungs.  I grunted and looked around.  I saw the snow and the rocks and the mountains towering the horizon.  To my left was a group of men dressed about like me with bushy beards feeling rather pumped with their weaponry.  I was calm like I was getting up and going to a desk job.  I woke up just shortly of taking that first step out of the door.

Thursday Night:

I was a dog fighter.  Not WWII style dog fighter, but a WWI.  I was in a plane that needed two people, one for shooting, one for piloting.  I could feel the wind against my face and the grit in my mouth.  I wore goggles and a leather jacket with wool or something as a lining.  I had no helmet.  I was the one shooting.  I was so full of rage that I have never felt before in my life.  The worse I’ve had is having to hide the fact my body was shaking before I killed a fat whore.  This was extremely different.  This was uncontrollable rage and no outlet (even with the gun shooting down enemies).  Unfortunately for myself and my companion, we were shot down and hit a barn.  I woke up on impact so I knew I had died.

Friday Night:

I was a Native American Indian sitting on a brown horse with a bow in my hand.  The horse had a white patch down its muzzle.  I rode off into battle against another tribe and took down a few of the others.  I was suddenly knocked down.  I could feel the grass crunch under my body and a pain in my side.  I landed with the wind knocked out of me.  As I gasped in air, I opened my eyes and looked up to see one of the other tribesmen stood over me.  I felt the knife dig into my forehead and I woke up.  I have a very strong feeling that I also died in that dream.

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